Identity and Purpose
It’s easy to lose touch with ourselves—especially after big life changes or years of adapting to what others expect. Therapy offers a space to reconnect with yourself, clarify your needs, and recalibrate your life so it feels more like your own.
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”
— Carl Jung
When You Feel Like A Stranger To Yourself
You might be doing all the right things—working, socializing, keeping up appearances—but still feel strangely disconnected. The roles you’ve taken on no longer feel like you. You may find yourself wondering: Who am I now? What do I actually want? When that inner sense of direction fades, even small decisions can feel confusing, and life starts to feel hollow.
Without a grounded sense of self, you lose a sense of purpose. You go through the motions, but you’re not anchored. There’s often a low-grade sense of unease beneath the surface—restlessness, indecision, or the feeling that you’re somehow not doing a good job of living. You might stay busy to avoid it, or blame yourself for not feeling more fulfilled.
Therapy can help you reconnect with yourself. That means slowing down and tuning into parts of you that have been pushed aside (because at some point you felt you had to, to keep the peace, to stay safe, to be acceptable).
Identity isn’t something you “discover” once and for all—it’s something you build by being honest with yourself. And as that connection strengthens, a sense of purpose can begin to take shape—and you can begin to live with more confidence, direction, and choice.
The Costs of Self-abandonment
Chronic indecision and self-doubt
Even simple choices can feel paralyzing. Without a stable sense of self, you second-guess what you want, fear making the wrong move, or look to others to decide for you.
Restlessness and emotional numbness
You might feel bored, agitated, or like you're just going through the motions. Life isn’t terrible—but it doesn’t feel meaningful either. There's a sense of being cut off from something vital.
Over-functioning and burnout
You stay busy and productive, hoping to outrun the discomfort. But beneath the accomplishments is a fear that if you slow down, you’ll have to face the emptiness or confusion inside.
People-pleasing and loss of authenticity
You shape yourself to meet others’ needs—staying agreeable, avoiding conflict, suppressing parts of yourself to keep the peace. Over time, this can leave you feeling invisible in your own life.
Shame and comparison
You compare yourself to people who seem more passionate, directed, or alive—and end up feeling behind, lesser, or like you're failing at adulthood in some way.
Creative block and fear of expressing yourself
You sense there’s more inside you—ideas, desires, creative energy—but can’t access it. You may feel scattered, self-conscious, or unsure whether your voice even matters.
Vague but persistent existential anxiety
There’s a quiet dread that you’re not really living your life—just performing it. Beneath the surface, a vague sense of meaninglessness lingers.
Treatment Path
Reconnecting to Self
In therapy, we work to rebuild a stable and fulfilling sense of identity. Drawing from emotion-focused, experiential, and psychodynamic approaches, we explore the formative experiences that have influenced how you engage in relationships, make decisions, and navigate your inner life.
Together, we examine the roles you've taken on, the beliefs you've internalized, and the patterns that once offered you protection but now create confusion about your identity. We focus on the small, everyday moments when you ignore your true feelings—saying yes when you actually mean no, downplaying what matters to you, and conforming to others' expectations.
These moments illustrate how identity can both erode and be restored. We are not trying to invent a new self; instead, we are connecting with the one that is already within us and waiting to shine.
What Might Change After Therapy?
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Clearer self-knowledge: You'll recognize and trust what you actually want
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Confident decision-making: Choices feel clearer and less overwhelming
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Authentic relationships: You stop abandoning yourself to keep others comfortable
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Emotional stability: You feel more grounded and steady with others
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Natural boundaries: Standing up for yourself becomes more automatic
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Intentional living: Life feels like something you're actively choosing
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Inner confidence: Knowing that your life truly belongs to you